2015 crazy customer award...

Zee

Zee

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Joined
Nov 2, 2007
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6,162
Location
SoCal jungle
Name
.
End of the year is upon us...let's hear it. Wacko jacko gayporn guys...naked alcoholic 76 year old ladies...."I'mma sue you" types

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Even if it's not exactly this year..bring back the oldie but funny stories.
 
Kellie Hiler

Kellie Hiler

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Nov 8, 2015
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Georgia
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Kellie Hiler
The snake lady. She had two snakes and she had two huge fish tanks and they were very elaborate. She would talk to them like they were babies, and explain to them that it was ok, we were just there to clean her carpets and all kinds of weird stuff. Her condo had to be a perfect consistent temperature a t all times i.e. Hot. So whenever we cleaned her carpets they would of course smell musty for days and she would call us back and ask us to reclean them and we would tell her over the phone that we would not come back, that it's not our fault, we told her prior to cleaning that she would have to get air movement in there or air conditioning and she would always say she can't do that. So we told her we could encapsulate it and she would say no, she wants HWE. Yet she would always use our company even though we would refuse to do re cleans. We cleaned her carpets about 7 or 8 times. She finally moved and we haven't heard from her since. Oh, and even though she always knew exactly what time we were coming, she would answer the door fresh out of the shower wrapped in a towel.
Me thinks she had the hots for one or both of us...lol.
 
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Mikey P

Mikey P

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Oct 6, 2006
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The High Chapperal
The guy today had 100's of really expensive guns


and a pig.

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Kellie Hiler

Kellie Hiler

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Georgia
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Kellie Hiler
If that's your craziest custy you are one very lucky guy!!
Then again you did mention you talk to Marty on the phone so........Hahahahahah!
 
Zee

Zee

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Joined
Nov 2, 2007
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SoCal jungle
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.
A 93 year old lady (I am convinced she shouldn't be allowed to live on her own) knew I was coming to check what needs to be done for her 6 month cleaning... She is physically in very good shape but over the past 10 years I realized she is crazy...

8:15am Door bell.... She yells out in raspy mean voice: who is iiiit?

I said "the carpet cleaners are here to check on your carpets as we discussed yesterday "

Of course she doesn't remember... And she opens the door a little... To tell me she doesn't want anything done. But since I'm there I can look...and she proceeded to open the door and walk away while telling me this is morning time and she always wakes up right around this time and takes a shower blah blah blah....
And this is while
SHE IS COMPLETELY NAKED....


And after she told me to come in and look around now she is screaming... "Get out!! This carpet was never cleaned in the past six years and why are you here?!?!" (mind you every 6 months I'm there cleaning)

She's butt naked and now heads for the kitchen... And she picks up the coffee mug to have a drink..but this coffee mug had shaving razors in it standing up. She looks at it and at me: "do you know what this is? This is what I use, to get the hair off my leg and...youknooooow."

Anyways picture the place with almost zero counter space open its so full of junk and the whole apartment is a mess.
 
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Zee

Zee

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Joined
Nov 2, 2007
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6,162
Location
SoCal jungle
Name
.
Another elderly lady recently storms into the bedroom where I was running the vacuum cleaner.... She's got this weird look on her face..

She goes: "turn that off, turn that OFF!!"

I look at her with a question on my face.. What's wrong what happened??

She holds up her landline phone and tells me "quiet! - I am now on a long distance call with (whoever) from New York "

And goes back to the living room to start a conversation...



:lol: :lol:
 
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Old Coastie

Old Coastie

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Jun 29, 2015
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Heart of Dixie
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Stephen
Cleaned the world's hairiest carpet, emptying the vacuum four times. Tossed in a bit of extra here and there, chatted guns with the owner who was cleaning his the whole time. He was surprised that I like snubbie .357's and debated their merits vs other types of handguns.

End of the job, he tips me a stainless .357 snubbie, saying he'd rather give to me than try to sell it to some stranger!
 
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Scott S.

Scott S.

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Feb 3, 2008
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PA
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Scott
cleaned for a elderly woman, we had the same conversation 5 times while I was there. same questions, same answers. Felt sorry for her.
 
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Mike Draper

Mike Draper

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Joined
Jan 13, 2008
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4,402
I actually feel pretty good this year knowing we didn't have any real crazy people. A few odd balls here and there. But honestly I've only ever had 1 absolutely nutty lady.
 
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Charlie Lyman

Charlie Lyman

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Oct 9, 2006
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Meridian, ID
Name
Charlie Lyman
Customer has a son that has anxiety issues. It's apparently so bad that he is considered disabled. Mom gets support to be his caretaker. The son can't handle any type of social interaction with anyone. It causes too much anxiety. So naturally, me being the friendly carpet cleaner, I go out of my way to try and have a conversation with him. He freaks out and goes in the garage and comes back smelling like pot.
One day he was standing in the front yard dressed like he was going to a rennisance fair. I said hi to him for the fifth time on the job. He ducked his head behind a branch in a tree. His face was covered but the rest of his body was showing. I guess he felt like I couldn't see him. So I politely said "I see you back there". He headed back to the garage.
 
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Kellie Hiler

Kellie Hiler

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Georgia
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Kellie Hiler
Old Coastie said:
Cleaned the world's hairiest carpet, emptying the vacuum four times. Tossed in a bit of extra here and there, chatted guns with the owner who was cleaning his the whole time. He was surprised that I like snubbie .357's and debated their merits vs other types of handguns.

End of the job, he tips me a stainless .357 snubbie, saying he'd rather give to me than try to sell it to some stranger!
Click to expand...
That's not crazy....that's awesome! Except for the 4 loads of hair that is...lol!
I used to have a 357 snubbie....I could tell you a really amazing story about but it would take a while to write..lol.
 
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Cleanworks

Cleanworks

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Oct 22, 2012
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27,876
Location
New Westminster,BC
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Ron Marriott
I have a crazy cat and dog lady. I was cleaning carpets for a real estate agent in a side by side duplex when he asks if I have time to clean the carpets in the bsmt suite. So I head down there to take a look and she has 4 cats and one big long haired dog and doesn't own a vacuum cleaner. She informs me that she has a cleaning service that comes in once in a while. Obviously no one has vacuumed for the last six months. There is cat puke all over the place and she says that she let's it dry because it is easier to scrape it off that way. It would make some sense if she had actually scraped any off. Then she says, do you think my place smells. The upstairs neighbors were complaining. I don't have the heart to tell that her place smells like a sewer pit because she seems oblivious to it. I just tell that every place with animals has some sort of odor. After vacuuming for 1/2 an hour in this little 1 bedroom suite, emptying the vac 3 times, I add some mint deodorizer to minimize the odor as I prespray. The cat puke comes off along with another shitload of hair all over my feet, my hoses, balling up on the carpet. She says that she will call me in another 6 months. I just smile and nod and hope she loses my number.
 
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bob vawter

bob vawter

Grassy Knoller
Joined
Sep 15, 2007
Messages
44,242
Location
La La Land
Name
bob vawter
Zee said:
Why don't you tell the story in great detail... Again..for the noobs.
Click to expand...

OK...i had jus driven to Ca and bought one of Gene Bates first Big Red Diesel slide ins...
it was a behemoth of a machine and i thought i was the cats azz........i took a FULL PAGE ad in the YPs......
so anyway this old woman calls me from Bloomfield Hills...a very affluent community with a purty good size house and i was ecstatic........i guess one could call the house a mansion although it was very old and showing it's age.....
anyway i start moving little stuff ..end tables..lamps...and those damned FLOWER POTS all over the floor.......
sooooooo i get to cleaning and come upon the first flower pot spot....whisssssh...all gone! the fricking carpet was jus gone......completly! i tried to explain that from sitting in one spot so long and being watered...blah blah..blah..
she was having no part of the discussion and went into a tizzy freaking out........she did however manage to call her daughter and screamed out...HE'S KILLING ME!!!!!!
I sat handcuffed in the back of a police car for over an hour with my machine running before it got straightened out.......

wait for it.........










i got stiffed on my first job!
 
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