Kirby

[Mikey P]

Goofball walks right by my two well formulated vans to knock on my door to sell me a Kirby.


Happens about once a year.



next week it will be the Cutco Knife guy followed by the army of dudes from Indiana selling the ultra concentrated miracle spotter.

and the meat guys
and the magazine subscriptions


and those dreaded JWs who don't keep track of the flock..

 

[FLYERMAN]

I get the lawn flyers for days and days. My favorite is the one stuffed in a baggie with sand to ad weight.

 

[Ron Werner]

did you buy one?

 

[Mikey P]

I showed him what my cat can do with our Roomba.

 

[pablomoreno]

speaking of roombas...I got a call last year from and old Friend, "Paul, help! The Dashund had diarhhea in the dining room and the Roomba spread it all over the carpet! "now that would have been a million hit Youtube post, if I had thought about a video...

 

[pablomoreno]

Speaking of Roomba's, an old friend called me last year. "Paul, Help! The Dachshund had the shits on the dining room carpet and the Roomba spread it all over the room." Man, I shoulda' thought of my camera.. that one would have went viral on Youtube. The Roomba was still running through the caca leaving brown trails when I arrived. Why my friend didn't shut it of is the real wonder here.

 

[pablomoreno]

[video=youtube;gzU2yh7VRbg]http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=gzU2yh7VRbg[/video]

 

[GeeeAus]

We pre-vac or "dry soil extraction" as we like to call it with a Kirby. Bloody great machine for the job.

Grant

 

[Desk Jockey]

Here's what I do and it has really slowed the traffic down to my door.

I whip the door open like I'm angry, rifle in hand and yell "WHAT THE F*** DO YOU WANT?

They usually back up (the smart one's run away) and mention why they rang the door bell. Not listening, I fiddle with the bolt action and rack the rifle so shes ready to pop. As they continue to speak I look them straight in the eyes and say get the fook outa here. Then just for kicks I let her rip (aiming at the ground).

It really keeps them from coming back, the first time I felt a little guilty bout it but that was years ago.

Hell now I even do it to Girl Scouts, band members raising money for trips and all those little fookin fund raising ball team little bast*rds!

The only real negative is cleaning up the sh*t trail they leave.



Juussst kiddin..........................................................clean up isn't that bad!

 

[Bruce Humphrey]

 

[SMRBAP]

Labor day I had an exterminator ring the bell - 9:00 AM........

Him - Hello sir, I'm from xxxxx pest control - I was wondering if you had any need for our services.
Me - Yes - In fact I do.
Him - Well sir, what pest problems do you have at the moment?
Me - Door to door salesmen, what do you have that you can spray around my yard to keep them off my property

He actually almost goes into his pitch.... pauses, smiles.... OK, you got me..... sorry.... the boss is making me do this today..... I like it less than you do, have a nice day.


I also lost a cleaning to a guy a few weeks back who was having a Kirby demo....... fully expected it to fix his black (formerly white) poly, walls lined with cat wee wee.

Didn't touch that one with a 10 foot pole, thanks him for his consideration and wished him luck with his cleaning.........

 

[Shorty]

As many know, my trouble 'n strife Delia, is a Filipino.

A year or so after she moved to the wunderful land of Oz, she was home alone and got the dreaded knock on the door from a couple of guys wearing white shirts and black ties.

They started their pitch, but got stopped with her outburst..........


NO ENGLIS -- NO ENGLIS -- YOU GO -- YOU GO !!!

Then shut the door on them.

None of them ever came back again.

We had a good laugh over a couple of beers that night, she speaks fluent English real well as Al & a few others can attest.