What's your most awkward cleaning moment?

[Walt]

When the lady of the house came to the door I could immediately tell something wasn't right. I asked if I should come back another time or day. She said, "no, come on in. I don't want to cancel"

So I start setting up. And each time I go through the doorway I notice a new item sitting there; first a box, then a duffle bag and finally a suit case. I also notice, the young kids nervously whispering in the living room. Finally, the dad comes goes into the living room and begins talking in a hushed voice. And then suddenly there is wailing and shrieking from the kids.

I panicked a little - this is definitely out of my comfort zone. So, I find the mom to ask if everything is okay. I certainly didn't want to go into the living room. She's shaking and looks like she's been crying. And she say's, "He's leaving for good. We're getting a divorce." And then breaks down in tears.

I tried to calm her down, and comfort her a little. Again, I offered to leave and come back another day. And again she insists that I stay. She insists that I clean all the furniture too. All of it was just lightly soiled, but she wanted it done. So there I was, stuck for hours cleaning all the carpet and furniture in the most unhappy home on the planet. I think I have the memory of the children watching their dad drive away from the living room windows for a very long time.

Very awkward and sad.


What's your most awkward cleaning moment?

 

[Desk Jockey]

Oh man Walt nothing I have will compare to that. Sorry that sounds like a tough one.

 

[-JB-]

Yikes!

 

[Charlie Lyman]

That reminds me of the time I helped my brother move after his divorce. It hurt to see his 2 year old son watch his dad move out.

 

[steve frasier]

have had a couple of long time customers spouse die in between yearly cleanings, you kind of know they are not there any longer but you don't want to ask, had one lady start to cry

She want a few spots of blood cleaned up on a carpet where the old guy tripped and hit his head on the corner of a night stand and that was the end of him. Never did find any blood on the carpet, think she just wanted the carpet cleaned in that room for peace of mind

 

[truckmount girl]

Hmmmm....husband was moving furniture in preparation of my arrival. Tried to move an antique dresser full of stuff with suff on top and broke it. Wife was furious, he was pissed, they were fighting like cats and dogs while I was trying to clean.

Another time had a mom and teenaged daughter go at it tooth and claw while I was there....

Yake care,
Lisa

 

[adamh]

I was just starting out, still cleaning with a porty. I was cleaning away and watched the old lady of the house walk outside by the front door window. Since she was outside ( I thought ) I lifted my leg and dumped a super loud fart! I had been holding it in for awhile and it was ready to rumble. After I about blew the pictures off the wall I heard a voice coming from behind me, " Do you need to use the restroom?"

It was the old lady standing behind me in the kitchen. She saw and heard the whole thing! I was so embarrassed........ She lived with her twin. That was the person walking outside

She never did call me back

 

[Charlie Lyman]

Adam's story reminded me of an old lady I cleaning for.
She had one of those chairs that help you stand up. She opted to not let it help her and when she strained to stand up, she ripped the loudest and LONGEST fart I've ever heard. I had to go out to the van and wipe the tears from my eyes, I was laughing so hard. I could only think to myself "man, I'm glad I didn't bring one of the kids on this job". We would have never been able to go back in the house from laughing so hard. I had to stop and realize just how immature I really am. Couldn't wait to tell the kids about it.

 

[vincent]

Cleaned a house this summer for a CEO of a major transportation company. I started in the basement because he said he had to get ready for work.

As I approached the 2nd level, I didn't see him anywhere and assumed he had left. So I presprayed the master bedroom and as I was walking out backwards, I heard someone say, "would you like a gatorade or water".

I turned around to see the homeowner, buck naked holding 2 bottles of drink.

First words were, dude, really... Then he says, haven't you ever seen a naked black man before? My reply was hell no.

I declined the drink and walked outside till he left. Nothing was said after that.

Freaken crazey.

 

[steve g]

thats funny adam, once a customer caught me using the vacuum cuff to evacuate a fart once while doing a hallway. I have too many awkward moments so here is just a few to make you guys laugh

doing a demo in a dental office, me and 2 other guys were working in the back room that also had a back door that led to the outside. we thought we were the only ones in the area. so I holler loudly "hey mark" he looks my way as I hike me leg like a dog pissing and let out the loudest rottenest fart, I turn around and while I was doing that I noticed that one of the dentists was trying to walk around me to get outside but couldn't because of the leg hike.

this happened to my boss, we were doing a water extraction, and he went a little to far under the bed, and a pair of panties got caught in the wand lips of the wand. he pulls the wand head in, steps on the panties, yanks the wand off of them. then reaches down and grabs the panties with 2 fingers as if he is picking up a sack of dog shit and throws them across the room, they stick to the wall for a second then slide down the wall somewhat slowly. the lady had been watching the whole time.

keep in mind I have been doing flood restoration for years, anyways if we found porno mags often times I would leave them out and open to a random page, just to embarrass the customer.

had a boyfriend of a early 40's single lady call in and complain to my boss we were staring at her tits too much. actually it was infact the daughter we were checking out.

I am sure I am missing quite a few, if you talked to people that worked with me I am sure they could tell a bunch more. along the lines of the husband leaving his wife. I was once doing a carpet relay and the wife found out her husband had been cheating on her during the course of my day there. she screamed, threw things, hit him, cried, made him call the "other" women and say it was over. the fight pretty much went on all day or the 5 or 6 hours I was there. they would leave and come back home and start the fight all over again. I still remember her screaming "was she that damn good"

a buddy and I still laugh about "big red" we go to move a dresser once and I pull a door open to get a grip, inside the drawer was a gigantic 2 headed dildo the size of a f&%$ing baseball bat

 

[Mike Draper]

Bob murdered an old innocent woman once.

 

[-JB-]

 

[Brian R]

I was running the bath water....Oh wait...That wasn't me.




I've walked in on more than my fair share of naked people.

Sometimes it's almost liked they planned it. :shock:

 

[Hoody]

I told this one before but I'll c/p it again, and not give the readers digest version.

Had a recently divorced lady decide to just sunbath topless. Of course I was cleaning the sunroom. As I turned to clean the edge of the sliding door, I happened to look up and saw her. She asks if I need anything very casually, not bothered at all. Simply said no and tried to go on my business. But as I'm there shes trying to make some small talk, and I keep my head down to the carpet(no not that one). When time came to pay the bill, I asked her to come inside and look over everything. She walks in with the bikini strap over her neck but not tied at the back so everything was hanging out, until finally tieing it after walking through. But she has on what appears to be a thong bikini bottom - there wasn't much that was NOT showing. She would bend over in a few spots to "check" how wet the carpet is. Being late teens/early 20's at the time I'm going absolutely nuts to stay professional. I was only there for an hour her appointment was at 10. She had asked if I could stay for lunch, but company policy was lunch could be taken at the earliest at 11:30, or as late as 1:30, so I told her no. I briefly explained why as to not be offensive in case she was being genuine in her question. She asked for my name, and I told her. She then said well I should probably have some another area or two done in a few months, I'll be sure to request an 11:00 appointment with you.

At the end when I was leaving, she asks if its hard dragging around those big hoses all day. So I stepped over the line a bit with a smirk and said, "I'm use to it". :shock:

I left the company before she could ever schedule her next cleaning appointment. Looking back I don't know what to think. She had money, her ex husband was a big real estate guy in the area. She got the house plus some killer alimony each month, and no kids(she felt like telling me this during her small talk). I tend to think I was being set up for a law suit, or some type of black mail. That or dessert from lunch would have been pretty freaking awesome. :shock: :?:

 

[Bob Foster]

MILFs need it too Hoody. You could have performed an additional spotting service. Always keep a spare booty handy...

 

[rhyde]

Old guy knew we where going to be there at 2PM he answers the door in a towel and nothing else that way the whole time

picking up a rug from an older lady in her 60's we where crouched down to look at the spots and she pointed to one spot then put her hand on my thigh and stated massaging it!

Picking up a rug I had really bad gas let one loose when we where alone( me and my helper) helper can't control his laughing just as the home owner walks by she though we where making fun of her dirty rug! couldn't think of anything else to say so I told he it was my bad gas! she actually seemed relived although not as relived as me !gotcha! still do work for her too!

 

[Ron K]

Former U.S. House of Representatives wife running past bedroom door she forgot all about our open door appointment and a Robe.

 

[FLYERMAN]

Lady following me from room to room making small talk and laughing at my jokes goes to help me move the bed back against the wall. We push it against the wall and I say to her "thanks, but this aint normally how I like to move a bed with a woman." She laughed long and hard. I said thanks for laughing because I went way out on a limb for that joke.

 

[Brian R]

I told this one before but I'll c/p it again, and not give the readers digest version.

Had a recently divorced lady decide to just sunbath topless. Of course I was cleaning the sunroom. As I turned to clean the edge of the sliding door, I happened to look up and saw her. She asks if I need anything very casually, not bothered at all. Simply said no and tried to go on my business. But as I'm there shes trying to make some small talk, and I keep my head down to the carpet(no not that one). When time came to pay the bill, I asked her to come inside and look over everything. She walks in with the bikini strap over her neck but not tied at the back so everything was hanging out, until finally tieing it after walking through. But she has on what appears to be a thong bikini bottom - there wasn't much that was NOT showing. She would bend over in a few spots to "check" how wet the carpet is. Being late teens/early 20's at the time I'm going absolutely nuts to stay professional. I was only there for an hour her appointment was at 10. She had asked if I could stay for lunch, but company policy was lunch could be taken at the earliest at 11:30, or as late as 1:30, so I told her no. I briefly explained why as to not be offensive in case she was being genuine in her question. She asked for my name, and I told her. She then said well I should probably have some another area or two done in a few months, I'll be sure to request an 11:00 appointment with you.

At the end when I was leaving, she asks if its hard dragging around those big hoses all day. So I stepped over the line a bit with a smirk and said, "I'm use to it". :shock:

I left the company before she could ever schedule her next cleaning appointment. Looking back I don't know what to think. She had money, her ex husband was a big real estate guy in the area. She got the house plus some killer alimony each month, and no kids(she felt like telling me this during her small talk). I tend to think I was being set up for a law suit, or some type of black mail. That or dessert from lunch would have been pretty freaking awesome. :shock: :?:

Forgot About Gratuity

 

[Mike Draper]

I have only had 1 akward occasion. A germaphobe who group up with her daddy proffesor in a plastic biological ant-germ house in germany. She was absolutey nuts. We had to stand on the front porch and change into anti germ clothes she made us wear, then immediately upon stepping the first step into her house we took one giant step into an special anti germ closet and changed again, at this time I was saying next thing and I'm out. Cleaning was going good, as I pull hoses in she cleans them for me somewhat amus very thoroughly. Then haf way through the cleaning with the rotovac the power goes out, we waited half hour it does not go back on so I started cleaning with a wand and she has a mental breakdown. She is panicking, pulling herhair and I thought she was going to beat the shit out of her hubby. Who btw is this frail little thing in the corner, poor bastard. She yeslls fo us to stop, then keep going, then stop. Fin.ally I just ignore her rants and finish the one room with a wand. And start packing my stuff to go, we still weren't finished so she is literally laying on the floor taking deep breaths like she is going into cardiac arrest. My assistant (btw, this is his first day and first job) stand by the front door, strip off our contamination suits and pack up as fast as possible, we leave while she yells at us about being bad business men. I tell her sorry and nothing else and drive off. Job was free and idgas. That is the only bad experience I've had so far.

 

[Larry B]

She want a few spots of blood cleaned up on a carpet where the old guy tripped and hit his head on the corner of a night stand

Just done one like this a couple weeks back. The husband passed away in the living room and when he fell he hit his head on a base board and knocked over a table with drinks and such on it. The stuff had been on the floor for over a year and when cleaning the lady just watched and cried. All she would keep saying was he was going to be gone for good now & I felt like crap while cleaning it. I think I must have told her her 100 times that she has to have better memories then seeing this on her floor all the time.

 

[bob vawter]

Bob murdered an old innocent woman once.

Jesus....one time and they won't let you forget it.....

 

[Brian R]

I'll never forget the crazy lady chasing me down the steps yelling "educate yourself!!"

She wanted me to run her "cleaning solution" through my TM.

It was brown solution in an un-marked clear jar.

She was a crazy Santa Cruz hippy type that wanted to use "all natural" products.

I'm pretty sure it was feces water. :shock:


Nuckin Futs

 

[steve g]

once the guy I was working with were standing in the living room not 4 feet from this older guy, we were making eye contact with him telling him what our plan was for the work to be completed. he lets rip 2 loud greasy farts and keep talking to us like nothing happened. I had to turn away and walk outside and let my buddy do the rest of the talking. I was laughing so hard I just could not keep a strait face.

I have several stories of naked or nearly naked women, since I have my own business and most of my work is referral, the strange things like that don't seem to happen to me anymore.

 

[Dmreed4311]

A recent awkward moment for me was knocking on the door of a clean at 8 am and the man probably in his mid 60s opens the door and
I could tell I woke him up, he had peed all over himself and did not even know it, He walked around showing me what he wanted done all covered in pee. Well I started cleaning in his bedroom and on the TV was the main menu of the porn he watched the night before. This guy walked around in his pee pants for about a half hour before he realized and changed his pants.

 

[glenboy]

having the police show up at the home, i was telling the cleaning lady we had a sch appt and all she kept sayin was Y'all needs to leave.the cop called me over to the car and said just leave and call the homeowner later.he soon informed me that this home belonged to Alto Reed,the sax player from Bob Seger.We went back a week later and he was there workin on his boat, somewhat amus somewhat amus

 

[gavin]

hope you charged an extra trip fee.

 

[Out of Character - 0]

Years back I showed up at a very nice home who called for an emergency cleaning probably 20 minutes after they called us. When I rang the bell the guy yelled through the door for me to wait a minute. About 10 minutes later he finally opens the door and led me to a "dog accident" in his bedroom. A woman was taking a shower in a glass enclosure in the bathroom which had no door and was very open. There was some weird Asian porn playing on the tv and about a dozen more films on the ground. The "dog accident" was all over the bed, down the side of the mattress, and on the floor near the corner of the bed. The dog was one of the smallest I've seen, it couldn't have made that much shit in 3 weeks. I always wonder what he was hiding or doing for that 10 minutes that I waited outside.

The initial post in this thread is sad for sure. Luckily I've never did one of those jobs.


My 2nd most awkward was a big, hairy, shirtless customer asked me if I wanted to watch some porn with him while I was cleaning the living room. He made several haunting comments about the stars schlong and what I'd be missing by rejecting his offer as I packed up.

 

[Giorgio]

Got caught red handed once soaking the custy's cat with my wand.

What could I say except I like wet pussy, cats. :-)

 

[Hoody]

Forgot About Gratuity

I wasn't Kleening Multiple Areas. :mrgreen: