A Taste of Berkeley

Joe Appleby

Supportive Member
Joined
Feb 8, 2007
Messages
606
Location
Danville, CA
Name
Joe Appleby
Thank you, Joe, for your estimate of January 17th, 2016. I appreciate the detail with which you described the work to be done and the associated costs.

I have some questions, if you don’t mind:

1.What are the terms? Do you submit an invoice when the job is substantially completed?

2.We must agree upon a day which will maximally allow the carpet to dry thoroughly. What is the atmosphere’s lowest humidity to allow complete drying? Does a wind outside, which can be used through the windows, play a big part in drying conditions? Is there a minimum miles per hour of wind you find minimally effective?

3.Does Appleby have high-power fans to expedite drying the wet carpet in the hallway?

4.Do you have an arrangement by which tenants may step upon the freshly cleaned carpet? I will be asking the tenants in Apt. #1 not to use the main stairs, but walk over to Apt. #2, whose carpet will also be wet, enter the kitchen, then walk down the back stairs to the outside.

5.Scotch Guard. I read that the main ingredient in the cleaner is a “persistent organic pollutant” that last one month until fully dissipated. What risks does that pose? Under what conditions could one of my tenants become ill as a result of the residual cleaning agent?

6.How could I preserve the effect of Scotch Guard from wear and tear?

7.While here, could you clean a sample patch of the oak floor in #2. I want to discern how effective your oak floor cleaning agent is before pursuing cleaning of the entire floor.

8.Because water and electricity are being used in the cleaning process, some danger exists. I require that the workers use GFCIs as a source of their electricity to reduce the possibility of electrical shock. GFCIs are located in the kitchen (and bathroom, if needed) of Apt. #2. You will doubtless need extension cords to reach all the areas covered by the estimate.

9.******recommended you highly to me. He also suggested that a “Value Package” of 42 cents per square foot be applied to our job estimate.

After I commit to your estimate and answers to the above questions, and we agree on a “dry” day in which to work, I shall request permission from our neighbors to the north to allow you to park in their driveway.


Thank you for attending to our needs here at****



I think this one's for Ofer.
 

ruff

Member
Joined
Apr 19, 2007
Messages
11,010
Location
San Francisco, CA
Name
Ofer Kolton
Welcome to the only city that is even crazier than San Francisco. I'd love to see your answer :winky:

May I take the liberty to suggest this:




Though I'd think this will be more appropriate:

 
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Zee

Supportive Member
Joined
Nov 2, 2007
Messages
6,162
Location
SoCal jungle
Name
.
I'd just respond:
"Miss/Mister... You misspelled Scotchgard. And there has never been -historical speaking- strong enough winds in the Berkley area that was measured, to get your smell out...because you are full of sheeeeeeeeeet! So don't worry about the carpet drying...there are more important issues on your hand"
 

rick imby

Member
Joined
Jun 5, 2009
Messages
2,210
Location
Montana
Name
Rick
Wow.

I wonder what this ladies procedure is to get on an airplane?

Does she need to see the FAA repair reports for the last ten years on this plane.

Does she need to visually verify the level of fuel in the tanks?

Does she need an FBI investigation into the sleeping habits of the flight crew?

She could really shake up TSA and get those lazy buggers to strip search every one of us. I wonder if they would have separate rooms to strip search the women and the men. What room will they use to search transgenders like Chavez?
 
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Jimmy L

Member
Joined
Oct 7, 2006
Messages
15,250
Location
Ne
Name
Jimmy L
Decline the job as you will lose sleep trying to please that bitch.
 

rick imby

Member
Joined
Jun 5, 2009
Messages
2,210
Location
Montana
Name
Rick
Thank you, Joe, for your estimate of January 17th, 2016. I appreciate the detail with which you described the work to be done and the associated costs.

I have some questions, if you don’t mind:

1.What are the terms? Do you submit an invoice when the job is substantially completed?

When we finish the job we will present a bill to be paid at that time.

2.We must agree upon a day which will maximally allow the carpet to dry thoroughly. What is the atmosphere’s lowest humidity to allow complete drying? Does a wind outside, which can be used through the windows, play a big part in drying conditions? Is there a minimum miles per hour of wind you find minimally effective?

We leave the carpet nearly dry. Usually 2-4 hours it will be dry. However if you stand in the middle of the room talking on your cell phone after our cleaning it will easily dry within in 20-25 minutes.


3.Does Appleby have high-power fans to expedite drying the wet carpet in the hallway?

Please stand in the hallway after we clean for 15 minutes, there will not be a need for fans.

4.Do you have an arrangement by which tenants may step upon the freshly cleaned carpet? I will be asking the tenants in Apt. #1 not to use the main stairs, but walk over to Apt. #2, whose carpet will also be wet, enter the kitchen, then walk down the back stairs to the outside.

The carpet is more susceptible to resoiling when walked on while wet. We will leave booties that can be used to cover the shoes if it needs to be walked on while wet.


5.Scotch Guard. I read that the main ingredient in the cleaner is a “persistent organic pollutant” that last one month until fully dissipated. What risks does that pose? Under what conditions could one of my tenants become ill as a result of the residual cleaning agent?

Hmmm, maybe you would like us to not use Scotchguard.

6.How could I preserve the effect of Scotch Guard from wear and tear?

Please reread last answer.


7.While here, could you clean a sample patch of the oak floor in #2. I want to discern how effective your oak floor cleaning agent is before pursuing cleaning of the entire floor.

I did not see where your Oak floor was patched.

8.Because water and electricity are being used in the cleaning process, some danger exists. I require that the workers use GFCIs as a source of their electricity to reduce the possibility of electrical shock. GFCIs are located in the kitchen (and bathroom, if needed) of Apt. #2. You will doubtless need extension cords to reach all the areas covered by the estimate.

It is extremely dangerous for us to use power from one unit to clean another. The extended length of extension cords make this unacceptable. Please call the city, and have your electrical service inspected and updated to the current code. Since you do not have GFCIs in place in your second apartment it is obviously not up to code. We cannot proceed with service until the city inspector signs off on your electrical system updates.

9.******recommended you highly to me. He also suggested that a “Value Package” of 42 cents per square foot be applied to our job estimate.

The value package is only available to customers we want to do business with, you do not qualify. Thank you for your time.


After I commit to your estimate and answers to the above questions, and we agree on a “dry” day in which to work, I shall request permission from our neighbors to the north to allow you to park in their driveway.

No need, we have gotten several jobs recently that will make it impossible for us to service your account for the foreseeable future. When our schedule opens up sometime after I have retired we may contact you again.



Thank you for attending to our needs here at****



I think this one's for Ofer.

I thought I would do the Heavy Lifting for you Joe
 

rick imby

Member
Joined
Jun 5, 2009
Messages
2,210
Location
Montana
Name
Rick
Being self employed and a nice guy with enough work to do gives me the option of not working for people that appear to be a problem customer.

If you think this customer is not way over the top, go for it.

You may make a cheerleader out of this Chavez (I mean B*tch).
 
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Jimmy L

Member
Joined
Oct 7, 2006
Messages
15,250
Location
Ne
Name
Jimmy L
KaliFORNICA is filled with nothing but Queers and lesbos. : )
 
J

JS41035

Guest
Super picky. Asks for a free sample. Then tells you the price.
Or maybe just someone with nothing to do and desperately trying to look competent.
 

Papa John

Lifetime Supportive Member
Joined
Aug 19, 2013
Messages
6,972
Location
San Francisco, CA.
Name
John Stewart
:eekk::errf:So you guys think we should turn it down?

She's already failed our psych test.. I'd be tempted to conveniently lose her email.--(during busy season, that is)
--- but then again--- It has been really slow for us due to the Rain-- so maybe I'd deal with her..
Please don't take that as in invite to send her my way-- she's out of our service area.
Good Luck Joe!
 

ruff

Member
Joined
Apr 19, 2007
Messages
11,010
Location
San Francisco, CA
Name
Ofer Kolton
:eekk::errf:So you guys think we should turn it down?
Hell, no.
In the past you used to refer these clients to me.
Now that I am finally privy to that tendency, how about referring her to Papa J.? He's got to be tested by fire too.

Why don't you start with copy & pasting her all 75 pages of the IICRC standard, as a starter? And do make it clear that there will be a test afterwards.
 

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