Asinine things customers have said to me lately:

[ACE]

#1 While doing the pre-cleaning walk through with a customer they guy asked what kind of equipment I use than says “Maybe I should have called Stanley Steemer, My neighbor says they do a hell of a job” I bout killed that old man.

#2 After closing on a call from the Yellow Pages the lady asked “You aren’t a druggy are you?” Lacking anything cleaver, I say; “No ma’am” She says my husband thinks it was rude of me to ask. Again, I was at a loss as what to say. I say “No ma’am I don’t blame you for asking, you can’t be too careful.”

#3 I was finishing up a job and the customer needs to leave to pick up her son. I take a credit card number and tell her I will run it for X amount later today. She says “I am not worried about giving you my card number or leaving you alone in my house. I’m in law enforcement and people aren’t hard to find.”

Gosh, people have some F'n trust issues

 

[Chris A]

I had a lady not too long ago leave me to clean, and then asked if I was bonded. She was a past customer who knew me by name. "Just up to a million dollars, bitch..."

 

[Jim Martin]

Had a big German lady thunder down a hall way and start bitching me out because my VACUUM did not remove the spots in her living room after I pre-vaced..........

 

[sweendogg]

I had a lady not too long ago leave me to clean, and then asked if I was bonded. She was a past customer who knew me by name. "Just up to a million dollars, bitch..."

Possible better reponce: " No mam, I haven't been to Jail in atleast 3 months."

Had a big German lady thunder down a hall way and start bitching me out because my VACUUM did not remove the spots in her living room after I pre-vaced..........

..." Oh you mean you want me to use that big truck out there? Well that will cost atleast another $450.00"

 

[rhyde]

Had a big German lady thunder down a hall way and start bitching me out because my VACUUM did not remove the spots in her living room after I pre-vaced..........

i bet Ron werner could have gotten them out

 

[Doug Cox]

I always like the people that have to show me how to turn the button on the door knob to lock it.

 

[TimP]

One of mine started to freak when I brought in a vacuum cleaner to vacuum their sofa.....then again when bringing in my omni to pre condition it......they were finaly at ease when I brought the hoses in.

I've also had a law enforcement guy say he wasn't worried cause he was in law enforcement. I've done at least 3 law enforcement homes in the past month.


But then it's always nice when you pre-condition and they go wow it looks so much better. Kinda makes up for the ones who aren't too bright.


Funny thing about the drug addict one is that one of the cleaners on the coast is known as an addict and stays in business, it's funny cause he has to have help because he has no license. One of the previous cleaners in my area was a convicted felon who was a sexual offender and he was around for quite some time, he got into his own business cause he got fired for going to jobs and not turning in the cash and got fired.

 

[renegade_cowboy]

I always like the people that have to show me how to turn the button on the door knob to lock it.

That is so true.

 

[TimP]

I always like the people that have to show me how to turn the button on the door knob to lock it.

That is so true.

I just learned about those new deadbolt auto locking things.....the kind where you can punch in a code and it will open it. But the guy didn't have to show me how he just said push the lock button on your way out and so I did.

 

[juniorc82]

getting off the subject a bit I totaly agree with your thoughts the stanly steemer comment. I love it when the custy drills you and then throws out some knowledge of carpet cleaning they picked up somewhere like they are an expert. Have any of your people drilled you for bringing in the 175? I had a lady ask if that was all I was gonna do and how dose the dirt get picked up lol

 

[Hoody]

"Why don't you own your own company" :shock:

 

[floorguy]

"Why don't you own your own company" :shock:

WELL!!!!!!???????

 

[Hoody]

Its a long time comin.... got to pay the bills first and get settled.

 

[floorguy]

well just make sure you stay south ehh??

 

[Bob Foster]

My landlord said I could get you to send me a bill for this job.

 

[Hoody]

I have no desire to even get up North to Centerville, you'll be okay. If'n you're nice I may even look at some more VCT for ya to buff and wax that I just hate doing. Just don't eff it up for me.

 

[floorguy]

I have no desire to even get up North to Centerville, you'll be okay. If'n you're nice I may even look at some more VCT for ya to buff and wax that I just hate doing. Just don't eff it up for me.

eff it up....what eva :roll: :roll:

youll be a hero

 

[Gary Taylor]

"will you except cash"

duh

 

[Chris A]

On the phone: "Is there a close cross-street to help our technician find you?"

Customer: "Oh its real easy, just come on into Shady Pines, then look for the old man sitting on the bench, then, well, wait, where will he be coming from, if its Akron he'll want to turn left at the dumpster, otherwise, oh but wait the've got the bridge out over there, just have him call me for directions!"

 

[-JB-]

"that dirty waters not gonna hurt my septic system is it?"



WTF do you put in you septic system that is so precious? :shock:

 

[Guest]

My landlord said I could get you to send me a bill for this job.

A new custy a few weeks ago tried that; He changed his mind after the police showed up.

 

[Desk Jockey]

I always like the people that have to show me how to turn the button on the door knob to lock it.

Well Douglas, if you were them and hired yourself, you're wonder if you knew how to work a door knob too!



:mrgreen:

 

[Doug Cox]

I was waiting for Chavez to chime in with that brilliant tid bit.

 

[Desk Jockey]

Hey in all my years of cleaning I was never asked if I could work the button on the door knob.
"Not that there's anything wrong with it"

You do know how don't you?



What were those people thinking asking that? :roll:

 

[Bruce Humphrey]

Had a guy last week ask me how often I cleaned out the inside of my hoses.

 

[Fletch]

Had a guy last week ask me how often I cleaned out the inside of my hoses.

"I just cleaned them out on the last job. Every third job I run the truckmount in reverse and flush all that dirt and bacteria deep into someone's carpet so they can't see it. I never do it when the customer is looking. But don't worry, I would never do anything like that to you!"

 

[Walt]

Hilarious, this happened about 4 years ago.

I knocked on the door, and a lady answered from behind it, "Are you from Eco Clean?"

"Yes" I said

"Do you have ID? How do I know your from Eco Clean?"

"Well, I have a logo on my shirt. And there is a truck parked out front with 10 inch letters that read Eco Clean."

Long pause. "I'll have to call your office". So, she called the number from the truck. And my cell phone rang. She asked if the guy out front was named Walt, and what did he look like. I described myself. I told her, "you can't be to careful. But he's a nice guy, you should let him in."

She opened the door and said, come on in. She's been a repeat customer since. Always prepays me and leaves me with a key to put in the mail slot.

 

[Desk Jockey]

I told her, "you can't be to careful. But he's a nice guy, you should let him in."

:shock:


You should have said "you should tip him well too!" :mrgreen:

 

[Jim Martin]

" I know there is a lot of urine spots..But the dog is part of the family"...........







My daughter is part of my family but she is not allowed to piss in my living room.............

Dumbass........

 

[Joel D]

"hummingbirds migrate by laying on the backs of geese"

"it's a coon cat- half racoon, half cat"

Walt's was awesome