Becker
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- Becker
So Just NY tude.
I said the reason, she went chem-dry after 10 plus years with me and HWE.
I said the reason, she went chem-dry after 10 plus years with me and HWE.
Huge mistake? Dating clients...
- Thread starter Becker
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Jim Morrison
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Did she do the dishes?
I simply cannot believe some of the responses.
Of course you should date her....WTF are you thinking?
This could be the perfect gal for you and you pass it up because you are not officially divorced.
I didn't read every response to this thread because it is like a mile long...but come on dude, go for it.
You can date her and not be so obvious about it and still protect your kid.
You kid comes first, that should go without saying, but is dating a great gal that you get along with well BAD for your kid?
If so, you have done some things wrong with him to start out with.
Now, I don't think you should have her over to your place when he is there and you two are shaking the walls.
But other than that, go for it.
A few years ago I passed up on the absolute girl of my dreams....for reasons a bit like yours. Wow. There is not a day that goes by that I don't think of her and realize how damn stupid I was.
Go for it.
DevilDog
Of course you should date her....WTF are you thinking?
This could be the perfect gal for you and you pass it up because you are not officially divorced.
I didn't read every response to this thread because it is like a mile long...but come on dude, go for it.
You can date her and not be so obvious about it and still protect your kid.
You kid comes first, that should go without saying, but is dating a great gal that you get along with well BAD for your kid?
If so, you have done some things wrong with him to start out with.
Now, I don't think you should have her over to your place when he is there and you two are shaking the walls.
But other than that, go for it.
A few years ago I passed up on the absolute girl of my dreams....for reasons a bit like yours. Wow. There is not a day that goes by that I don't think of her and realize how damn stupid I was.
Go for it.
DevilDog
The Preacher
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Devil dog, wuz she 5'2" also? have you always wanted a girl yore same height???
Becker
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This is getting be a long thread.
Her here for dinner last night was the "2nd" date. 3rd date is planned.
Yeah, she won't come over when Alex is here, nor will any girl. Not right away anyhow.
I don't see what it could hurt.
Her here for dinner last night was the "2nd" date. 3rd date is planned.
Yeah, she won't come over when Alex is here, nor will any girl. Not right away anyhow.
I don't see what it could hurt.
The Preacher
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did you get yore balls back yet, or does Stacy git to keep them on the days she has Alex??? :shock:
I guess I might not be able to be nice....5'2"? Geez, don't short change me that much (pardon the pun).
DevilDog
P.S.- The only way it could hurt him is if it confuses him. Remember, he loves mom and dad. He doesn't want to think mom is being replaced. Been there...done that.
Now really Becker, you need to provide detailed info. when you two hop in bed. That is your plan isn't it. If not, let me pull those puppet strings. I'll get the job done.
DevilDog
P.S.- The only way it could hurt him is if it confuses him. Remember, he loves mom and dad. He doesn't want to think mom is being replaced. Been there...done that.
Now really Becker, you need to provide detailed info. when you two hop in bed. That is your plan isn't it. If not, let me pull those puppet strings. I'll get the job done.
Becker,
Your son is affected by divorce and the older he becomes later in life it will hurt him even more.
Many here can attest to that .
If I may........
Please, will you consider slowing down. Give healing a chance between you soon to be ex wife.
Perhaps after wards you and she could date some and maybe with a little help from a clergy or counselor you both may find out what each needed to work out alone and then what you could have done differently so you
could possibly find a new ground for a new relationship.
You son will always wish you had stayed together. All children do.
Stubborn mindsets can sometime get in the way of what is better in the long run.
What ever you decide Becker, I hope you will do the right thing and for the right reasons.
Apparently you have a wonderful relationship with you little boy.
Your son is affected by divorce and the older he becomes later in life it will hurt him even more.
Many here can attest to that .
If I may........
Please, will you consider slowing down. Give healing a chance between you soon to be ex wife.
Perhaps after wards you and she could date some and maybe with a little help from a clergy or counselor you both may find out what each needed to work out alone and then what you could have done differently so you
could possibly find a new ground for a new relationship.
You son will always wish you had stayed together. All children do.
Stubborn mindsets can sometime get in the way of what is better in the long run.
What ever you decide Becker, I hope you will do the right thing and for the right reasons.
Apparently you have a wonderful relationship with you little boy.
Becker,
Your son is affected by divorce and the older he becomes later in life it will hurt him even more.
Many here can attest to that .
If I may........
Please, will you consider slowing down. Give healing a chance between you soon to be ex wife.
Perhaps after wards you and she could date some and maybe with a little help from a clergy or counselor you both may find out what each needed to work out alone and then what you could have done differently so you
could possibly find a new ground for a new relationship.
You son will always wish you had stayed together. All children do.
Stubborn mindsets can sometime get in the way of what is better in the long run.
What ever you decide Becker, I hope you will do the right thing and for the right reasons.
Apparently you have a wonderful relationship with you little boy.
Your son is affected by divorce and the older he becomes later in life it will hurt him even more.
Many here can attest to that .
If I may........
Please, will you consider slowing down. Give healing a chance between you soon to be ex wife.
Perhaps after wards you and she could date some and maybe with a little help from a clergy or counselor you both may find out what each needed to work out alone and then what you could have done differently so you
could possibly find a new ground for a new relationship.
You son will always wish you had stayed together. All children do.
Stubborn mindsets can sometime get in the way of what is better in the long run.
What ever you decide Becker, I hope you will do the right thing and for the right reasons.
Apparently you have a wonderful relationship with you little boy.
Uh Dolly, you are totally off base and living in pollyanna land. You must be friends with Darlene.
Not all kids want their parents to stay together...kids realize that sometimes it is BEST for their parents to part ways.
Divorce does NOT ruin kids. That is fricken B.S.. Sure, you would rather not have it not happen but divorce is not just about the kids, it is about the adults also.
If two people are going to be happy away from each other, they have a much better chance of being good parents to their kids. If they are miserable together....it is much more difficult to for them to be the parents they could be.
Life is short...and you certainly should not be spending it with someone that doesn't make you happy. Kids adjust amazingly well.
The key with divorce and making it work well is that you have to make sure you DON'T put the kids in the middle. Don't bad mouth each other in front of them and try to not get into any arguments or fights in front of them.
Think of the kids FIRST.
I cannot tell you how many totally miserable people I know that are in marriages because of their kids or convenience or both. It is sad as hell to see it.
If Becker and his ex-wife stay calm and think about things their kid will be just fine.
DevilDog
Not all kids want their parents to stay together...kids realize that sometimes it is BEST for their parents to part ways.
Divorce does NOT ruin kids. That is fricken B.S.. Sure, you would rather not have it not happen but divorce is not just about the kids, it is about the adults also.
If two people are going to be happy away from each other, they have a much better chance of being good parents to their kids. If they are miserable together....it is much more difficult to for them to be the parents they could be.
Life is short...and you certainly should not be spending it with someone that doesn't make you happy. Kids adjust amazingly well.
The key with divorce and making it work well is that you have to make sure you DON'T put the kids in the middle. Don't bad mouth each other in front of them and try to not get into any arguments or fights in front of them.
Think of the kids FIRST.
I cannot tell you how many totally miserable people I know that are in marriages because of their kids or convenience or both. It is sad as hell to see it.
If Becker and his ex-wife stay calm and think about things their kid will be just fine.
DevilDog
Ken Snow
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- Ken Snow
Another topic I am in agreement with Devildog on. Sounds like Becker is taking things slow and trying to make the divorce amicable and has his son's interest in heart.
Best of luck to you Becker. Go with what is in your heart, whatever that may be and do it with kindness and love for all involved and Ii feel confident that you, your ex, your new relationships and your son will be fine.
Ken
Best of luck to you Becker. Go with what is in your heart, whatever that may be and do it with kindness and love for all involved and Ii feel confident that you, your ex, your new relationships and your son will be fine.
Ken
If there's absolutely no way for you and your soon to be Ex to work things out, keep your pecker in your pants until your son is grown.
And for your wife...she needs to keep her lips zipped until your son is grown.
Since you won't share the details of the divorce...somewhere somehow you and your Ex failed the family.
If anything you two should stay together for the sake of your son. As long as there's no abuse, drug use or illegal activity going on in the home.
As you said, your son is your number one priority.
That's my opinion.
And for your wife...she needs to keep her lips zipped until your son is grown.
Since you won't share the details of the divorce...somewhere somehow you and your Ex failed the family.
If anything you two should stay together for the sake of your son. As long as there's no abuse, drug use or illegal activity going on in the home.
As you said, your son is your number one priority.
That's my opinion.
G
Guest
Guest
Well now!
Todd, that can be true in a lot of situations and perhaps this too may be one of them
But
It does not hurt to slow up.
take the time to heal
Evaluate and see if thing could be different. It can happen and he would never know if he or his ex do not give it an honest chance.
If it does not work out the he still has a chance to make a new life.
I just think for the sake of having this wonderful little boy they shared in having it deserves time and a second look from a different perspective.
many including me can attest to the fact that many years later you see things differently.
Waiting and being patient and taking the time to heal never hurt anyone.
In fact sometimes not waiting and giving yourself time to heal and being patient can hurt even more.
Only Becker can look inside and know.
I know you think I live in Pollyanna land. I don't Todd. I just think given a step back could make all the difference and if it don't He will know that he knows and no one else can know that for him.
As far a Pollyanna land...........there is no such a thing.........
:wink:
But
It does not hurt to slow up.
take the time to heal
Evaluate and see if thing could be different. It can happen and he would never know if he or his ex do not give it an honest chance.
If it does not work out the he still has a chance to make a new life.
I just think for the sake of having this wonderful little boy they shared in having it deserves time and a second look from a different perspective.
many including me can attest to the fact that many years later you see things differently.
Waiting and being patient and taking the time to heal never hurt anyone.
In fact sometimes not waiting and giving yourself time to heal and being patient can hurt even more.
Only Becker can look inside and know.
I know you think I live in Pollyanna land. I don't Todd. I just think given a step back could make all the difference and if it don't He will know that he knows and no one else can know that for him.
As far a Pollyanna land...........there is no such a thing.........
:wink:
Becker
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LOL,
considering i know must of you only by your user name, I must laugh at what I'm reading.
Thanks for the advice all the same, I won't go into details, but our marriage was a wreck for a long time, but both of us worked hard to stay together and mend.
No worries about the kid, he has been protected as best he can during this, including counseling.
considering i know must of you only by your user name, I must laugh at what I'm reading.
Thanks for the advice all the same, I won't go into details, but our marriage was a wreck for a long time, but both of us worked hard to stay together and mend.
No worries about the kid, he has been protected as best he can during this, including counseling.
Becker, you didn't take your laptop to the bathroom and log on to this bb while you were in your date right 
Just kidding bro but don't tell your ex about it unless she's already seeing someone. Otherwise, go for it, wtf. Believe me if you think you're good looking now you only have a few years then it's all downhill.
If it doesn't work out with this one you can always put a small classified in a corner of your reminder postcard
Albert
Just kidding bro but don't tell your ex about it unless she's already seeing someone. Otherwise, go for it, wtf. Believe me if you think you're good looking now you only have a few years then it's all downhill.
If it doesn't work out with this one you can always put a small classified in a corner of your reminder postcard
Albert
steve g
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- steve garrett
75% of marriages end because of adultery, this is likely the case in beckers too, having been though all this and having tried to work it out, in many cases you are better off to just go on your way, with that said sometimes just staying together isn't bad either,just have an open relationship, I could never do that though
hogjowl
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I agreed with you once.
And you disappeared for somewhere around a year.
And you disappeared for somewhere around a year.
brzelt
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Still no pics?????
Ken Snow
RIP
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- Ken Snow
Steve g~ that was not only an absurd thing to say but rude and insensitive to say the least. wtf would you make any insinuation about the cause of Beck's separation and impending divorce?
Devil~ I think it is great we can agree.
Ken
Devil~ I think it is great we can agree.
Ken
bob vawter
Grassy Knoller
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Becker...have you mentioned "the board" yet?
Darlene is here...will SOMEONE pleas sneak up behind me and....BLOW MY BRAINS OUT.........pleas!
Darlene is here...will SOMEONE pleas sneak up behind me and....BLOW MY BRAINS OUT.........pleas!
G
Guest
Guest
Darlene ran right over when she found out Paladin was here.
Once Becker's new girlfriend sees how much he's on the computer, she'll break up with him, she'll believe that he's a porn :shock: addict.
There is no way that she'll believe that there is that much to talk about in carpet cleaning. :?: :?: :?:
Once Becker's new girlfriend sees how much he's on the computer, she'll break up with him, she'll believe that he's a porn :shock: addict.
There is no way that she'll believe that there is that much to talk about in carpet cleaning. :?: :?: :?:
White-Magic rebuilder
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Dating clients is unethical and extremely unprofessional.
As to a divorce, well I've found the grass is greener on the other side...because someone else is mowing and tending it. Work on your own yard and soon it will be green too.
However if someone cheated on the other and you can't live with it then you can move on...but staying together is still best for a child.
Anything else is selfish.
As to a divorce, well I've found the grass is greener on the other side...because someone else is mowing and tending it. Work on your own yard and soon it will be green too.
However if someone cheated on the other and you can't live with it then you can move on...but staying together is still best for a child.
Anything else is selfish.
bob vawter
Grassy Knoller
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My wifes niece, after 22 years of marrage is running away wit her first cousin that she jus met......
NOW TOP THAT!!!!!!
NOW TOP THAT!!!!!!
RosscoPico
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steve g said:
Since that leaves death the only other alternative you have me thinking about starting up as a serial adulterizer to permanently avoid the Grim Reaper.
:? :?
roro
Becker
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- Becker
What can I say, some people have shit for brains.
2004 ( 2003)
Extramarital affairs - 27% (29%)
Family strains - 18% (11%)
Emotional/physical abuse - 17% (10%)
Mid-life crisis - 13% (not in 2003 survey)
Addictions, e.g. alcoholism and gambling - 6% (5%)
Workaholism - 6% (5%)
2004 ( 2003)
Extramarital affairs - 27% (29%)
Family strains - 18% (11%)
Emotional/physical abuse - 17% (10%)
Mid-life crisis - 13% (not in 2003 survey)
Addictions, e.g. alcoholism and gambling - 6% (5%)
Workaholism - 6% (5%)
